When I was in college I found myself Ubering to make money. This was in Southern California, and LA at the time was a constant flow of work. Occasionally you’d pick people up in a nice area and they’d tell you that they were sleeping with someone in a relationship, or that they themselves were cheating. This was depressingly common. I think that saying what they were doing to someone gave them a weird kind of relief.
Once I drove someone from Hollywood to Hemet, CA. He was very charming, and funny. When I dropped him off it was at a big blue building that they buzzed us into. He left me a $200 cash tip. I later found out this was what is known as “Gold base” for the church of scientology. If you don’t know what that is, it’s a completely normal not weird at all in any way location owned by the church of scientology. Feel free to google it!
A few months into my “taxi” career. Insurance companies started using ride share service, and some people who were more down on their luck would use it. Sometimes this was people just trying to get their kids to school, but sometimes it was much sadder. I can’t tell you how many times I showed up to a doctors office to see someone with accessibility limitations face drop at seeing my tiny car instead of a van like they needed.
The people with substance problems were interactions that would stay with you.
Once I picked a man going to a dental appointment and I drove him for about a half hour. He told me about how he used to run drugs in the 90’s, until they caught him with a few pounds of coke. He told me about when he was moved from Nevada to Florida for trial. How he travelled handcuffed in a van. How the cops would stop only once a day at McDonalds and for their one dollar menu item of the day. He asked me to stop at a liquor store he chugged a tiny bottle of booze, shoved mints into his mouth, then sipped on a soda.
He smelled like pure alcohol when I dropped him off at the dentist.
Near my house there was a methadone clinic. I would get up before dawn to be able to take those rides. (Early bird gets the worm right) Almost always they were sweet, and thankful. Sometimes they were a little out of it but I never felt in danger or anything like that. Just good people going through tough times. These rides were the most consistently depressing.
People who were going to court clearly drunk or high. Older women who had trouble requesting a ride and had been waiting in the parking lot of their dialysis place into the night.
They’d tell their stories sometimes. A person who was going to court for a child custody case, people struggling with mental illness. Some mornings were exhausting.
Being up that early you’d hit another crowd that I had never anticipated. Funeral goers. The saddest funeral ride was when a man and a woman got into my backseat. Rather than speaking to me the man handed me a neon printout of a map of a cemetery with instructions on what plot to go to. With, “Hello, I am attending my father’s funeral. My wife and I are deaf. Please follow these directions.” Written on the back of it.
The whole ride I could hear them signing to one another and trying not to cry.
There were also the retired gamblers. They’d leave their houses at 7 in the morning, take a $70 uber out to the desert, and spend the whole day gambling at the reservation casinos. The desert is where I saw the weirdest things.
The desert was the only place I had ever felt scared driving. It was in Temecula the “wine country” of so cal. Lots of wooded roads and desert. I picked up a lady just off the freeway at what I initially assumed was the edge of a golf resort but it was an unpaved access road. It was late and that area was especially dark. I was getting ready to call the passenger I saw them coming down the unpaved access road.
It was a tall blonde woman in a very nice pant suit. She was absurdly put together considering she had walked god knows how long in heels down a dirt rock road. She got into the car and was very pleasant. She said she lived in a gated community that was hard to get Ubers too and it was easier to send me to the access road. I thought it was weird but I did not want to be creepy asking about where she lived.
She was friendly, chatty even. She was going to a dinner party, and as she spoke to me I could feel her looking at me in the rearview mirror the entire ride. We drove a half hour away from the freeway. To one of those rural chic neighborhoods that you would hear celebrities had huge parties at.
Eventually we reached the “address” which was a paved road lined with trees. She told me to keep driving and I didn’t think much of it because again we were in a mansion style neighborhood. We hit a white ranch style fence after a minute or so going down the road.
That was the when I started to feel a bit uneasy. There were around a dozen no trespassing signs, and one of those classic “Forget the dog, beware of owner” signs with a guy pointing a pistol at you. I thought it was more than a little blunt to have that many signs but hey not my property.
We drove for about a minute when we came to another fence. It was at the top of a hill and it overlooked a barn with some lights in the distance. I know this sounds weird but it was unpleasant. I couldn’t put my finger on it. It was just a barn with what looked like a barbecue going on. But being out in the woods without any light had freaked me out.
The passenger told me I could just slide the gate open. As I approached the fence, I saw some signs that made me stop cold.
Off to the side of the gate, not quite in the dark, but on the fringes of my headlights. There were metal signs with bullet holes through them. Swaztikas, and confederate flags brightly displayed.
So-Cal has a lot of white supremacist pockets. I had dropped off dozens of passengers in Cities like Norco, and driven down streets with people drinking in the garage, and a nazi flag proudly hung behind them. It wasn’t my favorite but I wasn’t spending any time in those neighborhoods more than I needed to. This was different though.
It was after 11pm at night, and I had no idea where I was. I opened the gate , and down the road I saw what I assume were cellphone flashlights lighting up and coming up the incline. This made me very uncomfortable. I went back and I told the woman that I didn’t think my car could make it back up the hill if I went down it.
“What are you talking about? Just take me it’s right there.”
She was getting more heated and I could see the lights slowly making their way up the hill.
She kept telling me I needed to cancel the ride, and that she wouldn’t pay to not be taken the entire way. I told her the pin I was supposed to take her too was a mile back up the road, but I was so nervous I relented and cancelled on my end. She slammed the door as she got out.
I took off before I could see the cellphone light people get closer. The road back was much rougher at the speed I was going at. I felt a bump that felt like I hit a body but I kept going. My car was driving like shit but I kept driving till I was past the fence, out of the rich neighborhood until I stopped at a gas station. My right rear tire was fucked up, and I needed to change it.
There was a few nails that looked like they had been attached to a piece of wood on my tire. I was freaked out so hard and sometimes I wish I had called the cops and reported it. But of course all that happened was I got a flat on a back road, and I didn’t want to spend the rest of my night waiting on a cop car.
I know it’s far more likely that I freaked myself out than a bunch of nazis planning to mess with a random Uber driver. But when I pick up a well dressed businesswoman from a remote location, and drop her off at a separate remote location, gives me chills that I have trouble explaining to this day.
submitted by A lot of companies showed that they don't care about their workers health. I believe these things should be documented so that once the outbreak is over we know what companies we should "boycott" and not buy from anywhere. I'm talking about companies like Gamestop who asked their workers to bring their own cleaning supplies. Starbucks who under pressure finally gave their workers 30 days off of work.
We should also value the good businesses who acted quickly.
What do you think? Is there a list already made?
Edit: ANOTHER UPDATE! **GameStop - Refused to give their employees paid time off & claimed to be an essential store.
McDonalds - Five billion dollar company, no paid sick time.
Hobby Lobby - The wife got a "revelation" from God, so they refuse to close.
Kroger - Company (at least some locations) banned their employees from wearing covers over their nose and mouth because "it would scare the customers".
Vitamin Shoppe - They considers themselves an essential facility under the guise of a pharmacy (even though nothing sold there is FDA approved.) They failed to address the severity of the pandemic in a timely manner and failed to provide employees with any proper guidance or cleaning supplies in the last two weeks while stores saw a huge surplus of 5000+ customers who came in for immune supplements.
Starbucks - They cracked under the pressure and finally decided to give their employees paid time off, but still deserve to be on the list because it took employees publicly "crying for help".
Goodwill Colorado - Asking people to take time off from their own vacation time and just reducing store hours.
Bombardier aerospace - "No signs of shutting down but we are allowed to take time off without pay. Planes aren’t flying but we still have to work."
All the following big brands: Walmart, Taco Bell, Pizza Hut, Dollar General, Target, Burger King, Wendy's, Dunkin Donuts, CVS, KFDC, Quiktrip
Dillards - Many are elderly and/or compromised. Dillards refuses to close, or acknowledge anything on social media. The CEO is in talks with the Walmart CEO attempting to get Dillards employees to work there while this goes on instead of sending people home.
Westgate Resorts - Refuses to allow HQ office employees to work from home. They passed out VPNs to employees but still wont let them.
Sportsman's Warehouse - They aren't really taking any precautions besides closing early and customers are starting to flood the store more and more to buy firearms.
Massage Envy - None of them are closing voluntarily, and there is absolutely no way to do social distancing as a massage therapist.
Bloom Energy - They have assembly workers in Sunnyvale, CA (under shelter in place) and Delaware that they're forcing to work. Remember that a lot of these folks are immigrants, nearing elderly, and uneducated and they're taking advantage of that.
A lot of Hospitals - Unaware on how to handle this outbreak/patients, a lot of them are not equipped for this outbreak so there have been stories of malpractices being done such as sending people home while they were showing major symptoms of the virus.
Family Video - They are claiming to be essential because they sell some CBD. The current plan if anyone there catches this is to have someone else come in, clean down the store overnight, and run it the next day like nothing happened.
Intertek Automotive Research - Literally were told we’re going to keep working until someone at the company gets the virus.
The Fresh Market - "today I was sent home because wearing masks and gloves is apparently causing “more danger to myself and others”, they also aren’t sanitizing carts and baskets. As a cashier I am appalled we are being treated this way. I told management I would be happy to work as long as I was able to take measures to protect myself and potentially my family"
Dillard’s - Don't care about the health of their employees.
Chili’s- Orlando airport asked employees to come in to clean....and then fired them. Chili’s is owned by Brinker Intl. - FYI, The chili’s in the Orlando Airport IS NOT from Chili’s corporate.
https://www.bing.com/amp/s/www.orlandosentinel.com%2fcoronavirus%2fos-ne-coronavirus-airport-worker-layoffs-20200320-6pjs5hmaojhajbmltczllbomiu-story.html%3foutputType%3damp Home Depot - Washington Area - They have given us 2 weeks sick leave IF we choose to use it. We are being pressured not to. Called constantly to come in and cover more shifts for those that are calling out.
Arizona State University - Arizona State University has really showed their true colors in this. Recommending students move out of on campus housing but refusing to give us refunds for the housing and meals we won’t be using or the classes that we signed up to take in person that’ll now be online.
Epiq. Inc. - there is a sick employee with concerning symptoms and we are going into work at outside tomorrow.
Many of the casinos in Southern California. They only closed due to the mandatory shut down. By that time, a few employees already got infected. **
Part 1
https://www.reddit.com/JackSucksAtLife/comments/ggowsv/the_future_of_jack_part_1/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share May 2021: Multiple live streams stream the battle for supremacy between turd boi420 and JackSucksatlife. In the end turd boi420 ( the better channel ) prevails. Jacksucksatpopuppirate reaches 900k. Jacksucksatroblox hits 1.4 million subs. Snail mispronounces Kai and
snails finds it hilarious. Both the original ace and jack Massey welsh hits 1.2 million getting many live streams about this too. Jacksucksatstuff hits 1.2 million. Jack creates a video called creating a play button for my door but it gets demonetized, rumours go around the is found crying Jack responds with " only pussies cry and I'm more of a dog person myself ". Kai posts a picture of a hamburger with his face on it and everyone laughs. Jack also slices a Jaffa Cake in half with a fake lightsaber. On Jacksucksatroblox Jack plays Roblox with Jeb Bush. Jack is said to have a small brain by many of his viewers which makes Jack angry so he slaps a picture of Kai. Editor Kai is still a brush.
June 2021: Turd boi420 hits 2 million subscribers in June even though that's not the only thing Turd boi hits as he also hits the original ace with a chair ending their friendship. Jacksucksatdrinking reaches 300k. LittleJacksucksatlife and Jacksucksatgograohy hits 600k. Samsmellsofapricots hits 500k. Jacks Twitter hits 300k. JackMasseyWelsh hits 200k and so does Ejsafc. Jack opens up his PO box again and gets sent things like a gæ rhombus, an Eggplant with Will Smiths face on it and a big picture of Kai. Jack does his weekly Q&As again for a month and his Q&As are collectively called Ight Imma head Out, STOP WILL SMITH, Funnei memes, How 9/11 REALLY went down and Jacksucksatlife: The movie. Jack is hit with an eggplant on the street as well. On Jacksucksatstuff Jack gives himself the nickname the sexy boi. Jack also slaps 100 ( actually 10 Jack just did clickbait ) Youtubers. Meanwhile, Jack finally deletes after 2 years Deleting This video soon. Editor Kai is still a brush but now has 400k subs.
July 2021: The Original Ace comes back from the hospital and immediately calls out turd boi420. Turd boi420 responds with doing the original ace review. Jack is gone for most of the month on holiday to Germany and has a particularly LOVELY time. Before he goes he does open up his PO box and he finds a picture of himself smacking Flossy, a kazoo with the words slightly taller as a female boy rather than a female girl and a skirt once worn by The Rock. The rest of the month the channel is taken over by Kai making the views skyrocket. Kai does many videos like paying people on Fiverr to become my girlfriend, Hahahahaha funny meme guys and AUSTRALIA IS NOT REAL! Editor Kai is still a brush.
August 2021: Jack returns from Germany and starts busting out loads of content. Jack resurrects Editor Thomas only for Thomas to die a week later which brings Jack to the conclusion " if you try to resurrect someone they'll just die a week later " -Jack Massey Welsh 2021. In Jacks PO box he receives a picture of Barack Obama with the words we're always watching you on it, a pigeon mask with eggplant colours on it and some Mexician maracas. The turd boi420 vs original ace drama heats up getting more personal. Look what's outside door window is the new highly unfunny meme on
JackSucksAtLife. Littlejacksucksatlife and Jacksucksatgeography hits 700k. Jacksucksatpopuppirate hits 1 million subscribers. Jacksucksatroblox hits 1.5 million subs. Turd boi420 makes a life review. Jack explains to Mini Muka the reason he has more subs is because he simply has bigger p*nis. Editor Kai is still a brush.
September 2021: Turd boi420 sends a letter to Jacks house as a recruitment to stop the original ace, Jack declines so turd boi420 comes over to Jacks house and slaps him saying that the tables have turned so that Jack slaps his table in fear of it working for turd boi420. In Jacks PO box he receives a flag of North Korea, A picture of Wallace looking for cheese ( he's not dabbing )and A sack of air. Jacksucksatstuff, The Original ace and Jack Massey Welsh all get 1.4 million subs. Jack Instagram hits 300k. After finally reaching 50,000 likes on that one video Jack FINALLY releases I got 99 problems but a hoe ain't one in collaboration with Kai. On JackSucksAtRoblox Jack does a video where he gambles in the Roblox casino and his channel gets a strike for it not being family-friendly enough Jack replies with " Its a Roblox channel how can it not be family-friendly?". Jack does a collaboration with the Kai camel. Editor Kai is still a brush but now has 500k subs.
October 2021: The turd boi420 vs the original ace war continues as things heat up with the original ace diss track being made. Soon after that, the original ace vs turd boi420 boxing match is announced. Meanwhile in JackSucksAtLifes PO box he gets a kazoo with a minion on it, a mantlepiece with its everyday bro with the Disney channel flow and a miniature Donald Trump-wall. The virgin ace hits 1.5 million subscribers. LittleJackSucksAtLife and JackSucksAtGeography hit 800k. Jacksucksatdrinking hits 400k. Turd boi420 creates a new channel called turdboi gaming. A few days before one of his viewers is getting married so Jack kisses them on the cheek saying nO lOnG tErM dAmAgE. On the JackSuckAtRoblox channel Jack cheats in Roblox causing him to be IP banned from Roblox and the words Jack, JackSucksAtLife, JesusSwag4Dan and JacksucksAtRoblox are all censored on Roblox. Editor Kai is still a brush.
November 2021: The undercard of the turd boi420 vs original ace boxing match is announced, it is Kong vs Flossy, Will Smith vs Little Jack, Croatia vs Serbia, Ronald McDonald vs Colonel Sanders, Kai camel vs Augustus, Anakin vs Obi-Wan and Jacksepticeye vs Jacksfilms. In Jacks PO box he gets Star Wars s*xual fanfic, dabbing Luigi and the loss meme but with Will Smith. Turd boigaming hits 100k. Samsmellsofapricots and ejsafc both hit 600k. Topless Jack is created on the Jack Massey Welsh channel. Jack is harassed by a commenter so he controversially calls him a pee-pee head who does not deserve his milk. Jack reacts to Shrek Is love, Shrek is life and immediately gets prepared in case Shrek drops by. Jack is shown a dabbing kazoo and harrases his fans saying that all he cares about is the money and he isn't supposed to care about all the stupid peasants around. Editor Kai is still a brush.
December 2021: The original ace vs turd boi420 boxing match is decided that turd boi420 wins, on the undercard Kong beats Flossy, Will Smith defeats Little Jack, Croatia vs Serbia results in a draw, Ronald Mcdonald Mc defeated by Colonel Sanders, Kai Camel defeats Augustus, Obi-Wan defeats Anakin and Jacksfilms vs Jacksepticeye is won by Jack Doherty. In Jacks PO box he has a picture of turd boi420 beating the original ace in a boxing match with you suck on it, a paper kazoo and one of Editor Kai's old toothbrushes. After harassing Roblox for long enough Jacks account is unbanned. Little Jacksucksatlife and Jacksucksatgeography hit 1 million. Jacks Twitter hits 400k, Samsmelsofapricots hits 600k. Ejsafc and JackMasseyWelsh hits 300k. The Slightly Taller as a female boy rather than a female girl remix is created and gets plenty of views. Jack gets hit with a swirly and LOVELY face at the same time making the video unavailable in all countries that aren't Russian. Editor Kai is still a brush but now has 600k subs.
January 2022: Because of the picture turd boi420 sent him last month in his PO box Jack starts beef with turdboi, lighting a picture of turd boi420. In Jacks PO box he gets a chair with the turd boi420 logo on it, a turd boi420 lamp and a big pair of boobs, jugs, bambzookas, wongs, wah-wahs and zingers. Turd boigaming hits 200k. Jacksucksatdrinking hits 500k subs. Jacksucksatroblox hits 1.6 million subs. Jack reaches 2.2 million subs. Indian Jack is now the most unfunny meme on
JackSucksAtLife just above a video of a pigeon eating an eggplant. Jack signs back up for Fiverr but tells people and he's said stuff like "I stupid Kai smart" "turrrrrdboiiiiiiiiiii" and the classic "Hello is this quality content?" " no this is JackSucksatLife". For this month Jack is sponsored by the greatest game known to man raid: shadow legends, one of the biggest mobile role-playing games of 2019 and it's totally free! Currently almost 10 million users have joined Raid over the last six months, and it's one of the most impressive games in its class with detailed models, environments and smooth 60 frames per second animations! All the champions in the game can be customized with unique gear that changes your strategic buffs and abilities! The dungeon bosses have some ridiculous skills of their own and figuring out the perfect party and strategy to overtake them's a lot of fun! Currently with over 300,000 reviews, Raid has almost a perfect score on the Play Store! The community is growing fast and the highly anticipated new faction wars feature is now live, you might even find my squad out there in the arena! It's easier to start now than ever with rates program for new players you get a new daily login reward for the first 90 days that you play in the game! So what are you waiting for? Go to the video description, click on the special links and you'll get 50,000 silver and a free epic champion as part of the new player program to start your journey! Good luck and I'll see you there! Editor Kai is still a brush
February 2022: Turd boi420 decides to steal Kais 100k plaque which makes both Jack and Kai mad. In Jacks PO box he gets a tape with a video of a person unsubscribing from him and subbing to turd boi420, A group of people dabbing and a lamp. Jacksucksatpopuppirate hits 1.2 million subs. Jacks Twitter hits 400k. Jacksucksatstuff hits 1.5 million subs. Jack creates the sequel to I HATE VILLAGERS by creating I HATE VILLAGERS EVEN MORE ARGHGGHGGHH. Since his sponsorship with Raid: Shadow Legends ends Jack does a video exposing and roasting the game. In response Raid: Shadow Legends bans any person subscribed to Samsmellsofapricots, JackMasseyWelsh, ejsafc, JackSucksatLife, Jacksucksatstuff, Jack Massey Welsh, JackSucksatgeography, Jacksucksatpopuppirate, Jacksuckaagroblox, littlejacksucksatlife or jacksucksatdrinking. Jacks fans create the nickname Jack the big boi Jack tells them to stop and then we do it some more. Jack creates Jacksucksattwerking instantly getting 200k. Editor Kai is still a brush.
March 2022: Turd boi420 vs Jack Massey Welsh vs Kai Ross-Best for Kais 100k plaque is scheduled in CoolMathsgames. In Jacks PO box he gets A turd boi420 vs Kai vs jack massey welsh scarf, a piece of LOVELY fanart and underpants that Jack pooped in once. JackSucksatDrinking hits 600k subs. Jack reaches 2.5 million subs. Turd boigaming hits 300k subs. LittleJackSucksAtLife and JackSucksatGeography hits 1.2 million subs. Jacksucksattweking reaches 300k subs. Jack and his fans raid raid: shadow legends and manage to shut the servers down for 6 hours and get #MakeMobileGamingGreatAgain 3rd trending in the US. Editor Kai does a video with his doppelganger and it gets 2 million views. Jack does the video addressing the mean comment from Captain Sparklez in his last video. Jack say that turd boi be die after cool math game ( unliterally ). Editor Kai is still a brush but now has 700k subs.
April 2022: Turd boi420 vs Kai vs Jack in Coolmathgames is won by Kai. After that both Jack and Turd boi420 are mad so they both go to Kais house and slap him at the same time. In Jacks PO box he receives a poem from Kai about him winning back his 100k playbutton, fish food and a book full of dank memes. Little JackSucksatLife hits 1.5 million subs. Jacks Instragram hits 400k. JacksucksatRoblox hits 2 million 1subs. Turd boi420 hits 3 million subs. Turd boi420 reveals he is actually JackSucksatLife it is later revealed as an April fools by turdboi the great prankster. After the recent backlash Raid: Shadow Legends is confirmed to be shutting down at the end of May. Ali-A calls out Jack for shutting the game down and ruining other people's fun of the game. Jack responds with saying Ali-A suck moster d**k. FBE releases the video kids react to JackSucksatLife where they are not very happy with the content. Jack makes a reaction video where he shouts at young people for not liking his content for 12 minutes. Editor Kai is still a brush.
I have intentionally left out geography locations and flip flops. I posted this list about 8months ago but its dissapeared from my reddit app but still on if i go on the web page for some reason so this list is mainly for me to keep a record and share my experiences so far , enjoy :-)
1.) N.A.S.A. - North American Space Agency > National Aeronautics And Space Administration
2.) Dr Doolittle > Dr Dolittle
3.) Vasoline > Vaseline
4) SEAN William Scott > Seann William Scott
5.) Hellman's > Hellmann's
6.) Gravy GRANUALS > Granules
7.) Rizzla > Rizla
8.) Creation Of Adam - God's Hand Reaching Down > God's Hand Level With Adam's.
9.) Mona Lisa Not Smiling > Smiling
10.) Ford Logo - F has straight crosspoint > curl on crosspoint.
11.) 1 Moon Landing > 6 Moon Landing's
12.) Karma Sutra > Kama Sutra
13.) Macdonalds > McDonald's
14.) Lion's Can Roar > Lion's Can't Roar
15.) Lion's King Of The Jungle > Tiger's K.O.T.J.
16.) The Diary Of Anne Frank > Diary Of A Young Girl
17.) Statue Of Liberty - Ellis Island > Liberty Island
18.) Marshmellow > Marshmallow
19.) Mary Poppins - Spoonful Of Sugar HELPS The Medicine Go Down > MAKES The Medicine Go Down
20.) Capricorn Sign - A Goat > A Goat Fish
21.) Ford KIA > KI^
22.) Phillips TV > Philips
23.) Little Tykes > Little Tikes
24.) nintendo > Nintendo
25.) Donna Summers > Donna Summer
26.) Doc Martins > Doc Martens
27.) Fabreeze > Febreze
28.) Large HALDRON Collider > Hadron
29.) TOBASCO sauce > Tabasco
30.) HILARY Clinton > Hillary
31.) Chilli > Chili
32.) SAMSUNG > SMSUNG
33.) iPhone > IPhone
34.) Hello Clarice > Good Morning Clarice
35.) E.T. - Opening Credits WHITE > Purple
36.) Goodfellas - Opening Credits WHITE > Red
37.) Wheatabix > Weetabix
38.) Rice CRISPIES > Rice Krispies
39.) Great Pyramid - 4 Sides > 8 Sides
40.) Great Pyramid - Centre > On The Right
41.) Stomach Where The Belly Button Is > Bottom Of Rib Cage
42.) Heart On Left > Left Centre
43.) Committed > Commited
44.) Dilemna > Dilemma
45.) Pajamas > Pyjamas
46.) Griffindor > Gryffindor
47.) T2 - JUDGEMENT Day > Judgment day
48.) I'll Huff And I'll Puff And I'll Blow Your House DOWN > Blow Your House In
49.) MIRROR ,Mirror On The Wall > Magic Mirror
50.) Who's The Fairest Of Them All > One Of All
51.) ' You Want The Truth, You Can't Handle The Truth ' > ' You Can't Handle The Truth '
52.) Sherbert > Sherbet
53.) Buisness > Business
54.) Brussel Sprouts > Brussels Sprouts
55.) Anatomy - Small 1 Piece Liver > Large 2 Lobe Liver
56.) Bill Haley And The Comets > His Comets
57.) Tony The Tiger - Black Nose > Blue Nose
58.) Burma > Myanmar
59.) Film - Jupiter Rising > Jupiter Ascending
60.) Mr Moneybags > Rich Uncle Pennybags
61.) Monopoly - Monacle > No Monacle
62.) Chumbawumba > Chumbawamba
63.) Cruella Deville > Cruella De Vil
64.) ' Take my Strong Hand ' > ' Little Hand '
65.) ' I See White People ' > ' I See Dead People '
66.) Keenan & Kel > Kenan & Kel
67.) ' The Names Bond, James Bond ' > My names Bond, James Bond
68.) Seperate > Separate
69.) Lay-Z-Boy > La-Z-Boy
70.) Jim Carey > Jim Carrey
71.) Cadbury's > Cadbury
72.) Malteasers > Maltesers
73.) First Bond Film - Casino Royale > Dr No
74.) Easter Island Statues - No Hats > Hats
75.) Cindy Doll > Sindy Doll
76.) Laughing Cow - Gold Nose Ring and Gold Earrings > Cheese Wheel Earrings
77.) Carribean > Caribbean
78.) Thinker Statue - Hand On Head > On Chin
79.) Tweedledee & Tweedledum - Propellars On Hats > Tweedledum & Tweedledee - Flags On Hats
80.) Roy Schneider > Roy Scheider
81.) Julius Ceasar > Caesar
82.) Morpheus - ' What If I Told You ' > Not Said
83.) Shaggy's Adam's Apple > No Adam's Apple
84.) Phrase - ' For all Intensive Purposes ' > ' For All Intents And Purposes '
86.) Beckon Call > Beck and Call
87.) Tender Hooks > Tenter Hooks
88.) Madeline McCann > Madeleine McCann
89.) Tumeric > Turmeric
90.) Iburofen > Ibuprofen
91.) Bud Lite > Bud Light
92.) Green Mile mouse - Mr Bojangles > Mr Jingles
93.) Spiderman > Spider-Man
94.) Amelia Earhardt > Amelia Earhart
95.) My True Love GAVE To Me > Sent to me
96.) Quote : ' That's Not A Knife, THIS Is A Knife > That's A Knife
97.) Phrase- Chomp At The Bit > Champ At The Bit
98.) Phrase - All The Range > All The Rage
99.) Whacky Races ' Catch The Pigeon ' > ' Stop The Pigeon '
100.) Kit-Kat > Kit Kat
101.) Warewolf > Werewolf
102.) Wilderbeast > Wildbeest
103.) D.E.A. - Drug Enforcement Agency > Drug Enforcement Administration
104.) Jackson 5 - 5 Members > 7 Members
105.) Term - Card Shark > Card Sharp
106.) Song Lyrics : ' What Is Love, BABY Don't Hurt Me > Lady Don't Hurt Me
107.) Song Lyrics : ' I'm A Barbie Girl, In A Barbie World > The Barbie World
108.) Oliver : ' Please Sir, CAN I HAVE some more > I want some more
109.) Nikolai Tesla > Nikola Tesla
110.) Erwin Schröedinger > Schrödinger
111.) Hanna Barberra > Hanna-Barbera
112.) Frankenstein - ' HE'S Alive ' > It's Alive
113.) Glenfell Tower > Grenfell Tower
114.) Donald Duck - Neck Kerchief > Red Bow Tie
115.) Ficus Plant > Ficus Tree
116.) Margerine > Margarine
117.) Barbeque > Barbecue
118.) Daylight Savings Time > Daylight Saving Time
119.) Sweets - Tootie Frooties > Tootie Fruities
120.) TV Show - Barbaar The Elephant > Babar The Elephant
121.) Cat Food - Whiskers > Whiskas
122.) Klu Klux Klan > Ku Klux Klan
123.) Baron Trump > Barron Trump
124.) Inspector Gadget - Mustache > No Mustache
125.) Henry VIII - Holding Turkey Leg > Not Holding Turkey Leg
126.) Guinness Book Of Records > Guinness World Records
127.) Plane Engines under wing > Engines In Front Of Wing
128.) Dracula - ' I Want To Suck Your Blood ' > Never Said
129.) Scooby Doo - ' We Would Of Gotten Away With It Too, If It Weren't For Those Meddling Kids ' > Never Said
130.) Toys R Us > Toys (Reverse R) Us
131.) Song Lyric : ' RIDING In A One Horse Open Sleigh ' > Gliding In A One Horse ....
132.) Song Lyrics : ' 3 Little Birds, Sat On My Window ' > ' ... Birds , Pitched By My Doorstep '
133.) Song Title - Country Roads > (Take Me Home) Country Roads
134.) ' MERRY Christmas To All And To All A Good Night ' > Happy Christmas To All....
135.) The Grinch Who Stole Christmas > How The Grinch Stole Christmas
136.) Forrest Gump - ' I MAY Not Be A Smart Man, But I Know What Love Is ' > I'm Not A Smart Man..
137.) Meatloaf > Meat Loaf
138.) Barbara Streisand > Barbra Streisand
139.) Tinkerbell > Tinker Bell
140.) Grease Lightning > Greased Lightnin'
141.) WE'RE Gonna Need A Bigger Boat > You're
142.) Selsum Blue > Selsun Blue
143.) Song Lyrics : ' You've Been STRUCK By A Smooth Criminal ' > ' ... Hit By A Smooth Criminal '
144.) Robert Deniro > Robert De Niro
145.) Mother Theresa > Mother Teresa
146.) Cadbury's CREAM Egg > Creme Egg
147.) Absolute Vodka > Absolut Vodka
148.) Song Lyrics : ' How Deep Is Your Love, I Really NEED TO KNOW ' > ' ... Mean To Learn '
149.) Innoculate > Inoculate
150.) Harry Houdini Died Whilst Performing A Magic Trick > Appendicitus In Hospital
151.) Gobstoppers > Gobstopper
152.) Zapruder Film Originally In Black And White > Doesn't Exist
153.) J.F.K. - 4 Seater - 6 Seater
154.) An Interview With A Vampire > ..The Vampire
155.) Michaelangelo > Michelangelo
156.) Cheez Itz > Cheez It
157.) King Tut's Mask - 1 Snake > 2 Snakes
158.) King Tut - 12yr Old When He Died > 19yrs
159.) Jimmy Saville > Savile
160.) Bruce Lee Shot Dead On Set > Died In Hospital With Cerebral Edema
161.) WW1 : 1914 - 1919 > 1914 - 1919
162.) CD+R > Never Existed
163.) Barrack Obama > Barack Obama
164.) Macintosh > McIntosh
165.) Seasame Street > Sesame Street
166.) Big Bird All Yellow > Orange Legs, White Fringe
167.) Jungle Book - ' I Couldn't Be Fonder Of My New Home ' > ' I Couldn't Be Found Of My Home '
168.) Alex The Kidd > Alex Kidd In Miracle World
169.) Acknowledgement > Acknowledgment
170.) Dan Ackroyd > Dan Aykroyd
171.) Courtney Cox > Courteney Cox
172.) Film Title : They Live ! > They Live
173.) Alfa Romero > Alfa Romeo
174.) Tumeric > Turmeric
175.) Doughnuts > Donuts
176.) Toby Maguire > Tobey Maguire
177.) Moby Dick > Moby-Dick
178.) Brylcream > Brylcreem
179.) Heart The Size Of 1 Fist > 2 Fists
180.) Movie Title : Fists Of Fury > Fist Of Fury
181.) Willy Wonka's Hat - Purple > Brown
182.) Willy Wonka Quote : ' You Do know What Happened To The BOY Who Got Everything He Ever Wanted, Don't You? ' > ' Don’t forget what happened to the MAN who suddenly got everything he wanted. '
183.) Life IS Like A Box Of Chocolates > Life WAS Like A Box Of Chocolates
184.) Advisor > Adviser
185.) Cheverolet > Chevrolet
186.) Worcester Sauce > Worcestershire Sauce
187.) Objects In The Mirror MAYBE Closer Than They Appear > .... Are Closer Than They Appear
188.) Betty Eggleton > Eagleton
189.) Airdree > Airdrea
190.) Bubbalicious > Bubblicious
191.) Song Lyrics : ' Don't BREAK My Heart, My Achy Breaky Heart ' > Don't tell My Heart .......
192.) Film Title : Stockade > Cadence
193.) Allah akbar > Allahu Akbar
194.) Latoya Jackson > La Toya Jackson
195.) How To Kill A Mockingbird > To Kill A Mockingbird
196.) Possum > Opossum
197.) Song Lyrics : ' Sweet Dreams Are Made Of THESE ' > ' Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This
198.) Flintstones : ' Wilma, I'm Home ' > Never Said
199.) Star Trek : ' Beam me up, Scotty ' > Never Said
200.) Country - Columbia > Colombia
201.) Movie Title : The Sandlot Kids > The Sandlot
202.) Lionel Ritchie > Lionel Richie
203.) Bette Middler > Bette Midler
204.) Betty Boo > Betty Boop
205.) Song Lyrics : ' The Best Things In Life ARE Free ' > The Best Things In Life They're Free
206.) Song Lyrics : ' Never Meant To Make Your Daughter Cry, I Apologise A THOUSAND Times ' > ' ...... I Apologise A Trillion Times '
207.) Song Lyrics : ' I see A Bad Moon A Rising ' > ' I See The Bad Moon Rising '
208.) Sarah Michelle Geller > Gellar
209.) Pharoah > Pharaoh
210.) Song Lyrics : ' It's A Hard Knock Life ' > ' It's The Hard Knock Life '
211.) Withdrawl > Withdrawal
212.) Toys : Playschool > Playskool
213.) U.S.S.R. - United Soviet Socialist Republic > Union Of Soviet Socialist Republics
214.) Charlie Bit My Finger > Charlie Bit Me
215.) Dawn Of The Planet Of The Apes - Set 8 Years After Original Film > Set 10 Years After
216.) Bolognaise > Bolognese
217.) Oxy Clean > Oxi Clean
218.) Sally Fields > Sally Field
219.) Song Lyrics : ' What Would You DO If I Sang Out Of Tune ' > ' What Would You Think ....... '
220.) Lasagna > Lasagne
221.) Pidgeon > Pigeon
222.) Expresso > Never Existed
223.) War OF The Planet Of The Apes > War FOR The Planet Of The Apes
224.) Battleships Board Game > Battleship
225.) Earwigs Couldn't Fly > Earwigs CAN Fly
226.) Julius Caesar First Emperor Of Rome > Augustus
227.) Ryannair > Ryanair
228.) Boys Stop Growing At Age 21 > Age 16-18
229.) Red Hot Chilli Peppers > Chili Peppers
230.) Cellotape > Sellotape
231.) Transformers : Dark Side Of The Moon > Dark Of The Moon
232.) Song Lyrics : ' Ain't THAT A Kick In The Head ' > ' Ain't LOVE A Kick In The Head
233.) Phrase : ' Just Desserts ' > ' Just Deserts '
234.) Daddy Long Legs > Cellar Spiders
235.) StraightJacket > StraitJacket
236.) Wookie > Wookiee
237.) Movie Title : Up! > Up
238.) Karate kid Headband - Red Rising Sun > White Lotus Flower
239.) Miss Piggy - Mole On Cheek > No Mole
240.) Statue Of Liberty - Bare Ankles > Shackles On Ankles
241.) ' Luke, I Am Your Father ' > ' No, I Am Your Father '
242.) We Are The Champions.. Of The World > No ' Of The World ' At The End
243.) Ghandi > Gandhi
244.) 'Me Tarzan, You Jane' > Never Said
245.) Blue Ribbon > Blue Riband
246.) Doctor Who > Dr Who
247.) ' If You Build It , THEY Will Come ' > ' ... HE Will Come '
248.) 52 U.S. States > 50 States
249.) VW Logo No Gap > Gap
250.) Wiley Coyote > Wile E Coyote
251.) Jack The Ripper Killed 11 > Killed 5
252.) Marseilles, France > Marseille
253.) Raisin Bran - Sun Had Shades > No Glasses
254.) Song Title : Gangster's Paradise > Gangsta's Paradise
255.) Song Title : Hit Me Baby One More Time > Baby One More Time
256.) Can You Smell What The Rock Is Cooking > If You Smell What The Rock Is Cooking
257.) Flintstones : Bam Bam Rubble > Bamm-Bamm Rubble
258.) St John's Ambulance > St John Ambulance
259.) Song Lyrics : 'Footloose, Footloose Kick Off YOUR Sunday Shoes > ' ...THE Sunday Shoes '
260.) Mad Max - Beyond THE Thunderdome > Beyond Thunderdome
261.) Wall Murial > Wall Mural
262.) Heinz Meanz Beanz > Beanz Meanz Heinz
263.) Three Amigos > ¡Three Amigos!
264.) Aladdin - Arabian > Aladdin - Chinese
265.) Beavis And Butthead > Beavis And Butt-Head
266.) Shell Logo : The Word 'SHELL' At The Top With A Shell Image Underneath > No Word At Top
267.) A-Team - Mad Dog Murdock > Howling Mad Murdock
268.) Vick's Vapour Rub > Vick's VapoRub
269.) Cup O' Noodles > Cup Noodles
270.) Charlie And The Chocolate Factory > Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory (1971 film)
271.) Cheryl Crow - Sheryl Crow
272.) Pavillion > Pavilion
273.) Videgame : Grand Tourismo > Gran Turismo
274.) Aladdin - Return Of Jafaar > Jafar
275.) Matrix : ' Mr Anderson , We've Been Expecting You ' > Never Said
276.) Soccer Player : Lucas Modric > Luka Modrić
277.) Soccer Player : Roberto Firminio > Roberto Firmino
278.) Soccer Player : Saido Mane > Sadio Mané
279.) Song Lyrics : ' Where The Eagles FLY, On A Mountain High ' > ' Where The Eagles CRY.....
280.) Snow White And The Seven Dwarves > Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs
281.) Little Mermaid - Sebastian Yellow Eyes > Back To White
282.) Roger Rabbit - White Eyes > Blue Eyes
283.) Mr Deeds - ' Want Me To Wipe The Leaves On Your Ficus PLANT, Preston ' > ' ...... Ficus TREE '
284.) ' Wee Willie Winkie RUNNING Through The Town ' > ' ... RUNS Through The Town
285.) Song Lyrics : ' When I Grow Up, I Wanna See The World, Drive Nice Cars, I Wanna Have Boobies ' > ' .... I Wanna Have Groupies '
286.) Film Title : Rocky And Bullwinkle > The Adventures Of Rocky And Bullwinkle
287.) Supermissive Black Hole > Supermassive
288.) Broach > Brooch
289.) Song Title : Promiscious Girl > Promiscuous
290) Film Title : Face Off > Face/Off
291.) Susannah Reid > Susanna
292.) R2D2 - No Wires On Feet > Wires On Feet
293.) C3po - All Gold > Silver Leg, Wires On Stomach, Black Palms, Antenna
294.) Song Lyrics : ' You Scumbag, You Maggot, You Cheap Lousy Faggot, Happy Christmas Your Arse, AND THANK God It's Our Last ' > ' .... I PRAY God It's Our Last
295.) Speech - ' I HAD A Dream ' > ' I HAVE A Dream '
296.) Gettysburg Address : ' Fourscore And Seven Years Ago Our FORFATHERS Brought Forth On This Continent... ' > ' ..... Our FATHERS ..... '
297.) Sex In The City > Sex And The City
298.) Arethra Franklin > Aretha Franklin
299.) Haley's Comet > Halley's Comet
300.) Sonic's Arms Blue > Bare
301.) Paddington Yellow Coat > Blue Coat
302.) U.K. Passport 2 Lions > Lion & A Unicorn
303.) Homer Simpson - 3 Strands Of Hair > 2 Strands Of Hair
304.) Spelling - Villiage > Village
305.) Ronald McDonald's Hair - Fuzzy > Straight
submitted by Combined ~$85k gross. Lots of changes since
my last diary! I'm still long winded!
Section One: Assets and Debt Retirement Balance: $2,178.34 - 6.5%. Employer will put in 7.5%, vested at 5 years. B and I work at the same place, I'm guessing his balance is around $30k as he's vested.
Equity: I live with my fiance B. His 2 bed/1 bath house was paid off before we started dating. I'd say about $25k equity. VLCOL area.
Savings account balance: $517 in a HYSA.
Z's expense account: $245. I randomly put chunks of my child support in here to pay for school lunch and pictures, extracurriculars, co-pays, etc.
Wedding fund: $0, I just paid the deposit for our photographer ($400) and bought save the dates ($133).
Checking account balance: $1,831.04
Credit card debt: $4,055.62. Down $700 from my last diary when I was too scared to add the numbers up. I will hopefully be able to pay most of this off with my tax return.
Student loan debt: $30,287.51 for my LPN program and ADN, still in my grace period from my attempt at my BSN last fall. I should be paying my interest but alas, I'm not.
Clinic bill: $990.89. Somehow they got my old insurance company to cover my CT, so this is the remaining balance.
Section Two: Income Main Job Monthly Take Home: $2300 for me. Just got a raise to $28.11 base and the shift differential was increased a bit. B brings home ~$1500 depending on how his on-call weeks fall. We are both hourly and get that sweet, sweet extra check 2x/year (looking at you January). We have separate accounts.
Side gig: B is a volunteer firefighter and gets paid once a year in November. The amount depends on the number of calls he responds to. Last year it was about $1250 and he used it for Christmas spending. I pick up some OT here and there.
Any Other Monthly Income: $531 child support
Section Three: Expenses Pre-Tax Deductions Health insurance: $514/month for Z and myself (plus $1200/year deductible).
Vision and dental: $81.54/month for Z and myself.
FSA: $140/month. I'm able to flex daycare as well as health care costs. Will be adjusted in January to about $250/month and I'm going to cry when I see my paychecks.
Monthly Expenses Rent/mortgage: B's house is paid off. My daughter Z lives with us the majority of the time, and B's stepson E is here every other weekend.
Home insurance: $127, B pays. It's combined with his car insurance.
Savings contribution: I aim for $200 into the wedding fund, $150 into the emergency fund. I haven't put anything in since September since I'm paying to get out of my old house (ending contracts, dumpster fees, final bill payments).
Debt payments: credit cards - $170, clinic bill - $100. B throws money towards a snowblower he bought last month on a 0% interest promo, his only debt right now. Amount owed is $1600 - it's a pretty sweet machine.
Donations: ad hoc throughout the year, most ends up going to the kids' schools.
Electric: Between $60-160 depending on the season, B pays. I will cover more day to day expenses in the summer to make up for it.
Natural gas: $56, B pays.
Watesewegarbage: ~$60, B pays.
School lunch: $46. I pay.
Daycare: $29/week school year rate. I reimburse myself from my FSA.
Groceries: Around $400 for all of us. B and I trade off.
Wifi: $75, B pays.
Bed payment: $140/month, 4 months left. I paid half up front and financed the rest. I pay.
Car payment: $405.27 for my car. B's car and truck are paid off.
Cellphone: $275. 4 unlimited lines, 3 phone payments (ouch we're dumb), and $8/month for Z's new tablet. I went through our bill line by line and was shocked at how much I was paying for stuff we didn't need, like visual voicemail and high tier insurance, so I cut it way back. I pay.
Subscriptions: $84 for Netflix, Hulu Live, Apple storage for Z, Pandora Premium (couldn't give up my playlists) and Dollar Shave Club. I pay and share.
Prescriptions: $14 out of my FSA.
Eyelash extensions: $120
Amazon subscribe and save: It varies, but ~$40 for energy drinks and OTC meds every month. Other stuff like paper products, furnace filters and litter genie refills as needed. I pay.
Other Expenses Property Taxes: $507/year. B pays.
Amazon Prime: $59/year, still on my student email. I pay and share with B.
Pet expenses: 3 dogs and 1 cat combined! $33.49/month dog food. $28.60/every 3 months cat food & litter (all through Chewy). $240/year for doggie haircuts. I pay for all this, plus my animals' shots as needed. B pays for his dog's shots and treats/toys. We keep going back and forth on pet insurance, although I know we should just get it.
Car insurance: $258.50 every Feb/August for my car.
Car registration: $293/year, also due in Feb.
Z's extracurriculars (dance and taekwondo): ~$600/year, depending on costume/shoe costs. I pay.
Day 1: Saturday 10/26
12 AM: I still don't sleep at night, even on my days (nights?) off. I spend time online designing our wedding and reception invitations, updating our wedding website and searching for a bakery. I'm quite pleased with my progress. We have a reception venue, DJ, photographer, officiant and are doing our own food. Just need desserts and a ceremony space.
3 AM: Titanic is on! I've seen it approximately 187 times and still cry every time Rose lets Jack go. I put on some nail polish strips (yes they are Color Street, please don't kill me) and make a bag of popcorn. Kick myself for the popcorn because I'm supposed to be IF.
6:30 AM: Head downstairs to sleep. Spoiler alert: I don't. B wakes up at 7:30, gets a few minutes of cuddles and goes upstairs. Dink around on social media for a while and drink almost my entire 40 oz water bottle. Why am I always so thirsty when I go to bed? Make a mental note to track my water intake.
10:05 AM: The dogs are barking frantically at the air. B lets them out to play in the yard for a while. Bed payment comes out of my account. I eventually fall asleep.
3:15 PM: B comes down to wake me up. We are going to see one of my favorite local bands at the casino and staying overnight. It's a Halloween party and I can't wait to see the crazy costumes. We had a garage sale last month and hoarded some of that money for this weekend. I pack a few things in the overnight bag and trudge upstairs for a body shower. I clean my eyelashes with special foam soap and wash my face with Cerave Hydrating face wash in the shower. Get out to brush and seal my eyelashes, put some hydrocortisone on my eyelids to fend off my eczema, and apply COSRX BHA Blackhead Power Liquid to the rest of my face. Still don't wear makeup. Brush my teeth and spritz on Poison Girl by Dior perfume. Look at me with the grown up products! I refresh my waves with a DIY spray bottle of LA Looks Gel and water and I'm ready to go. Somehow, B is not despite being up since 7:30. 🙄
4:30 PM: We put the dogs in the garage and head to my old house to put my couch and recliner on the curb since it's a surprisingly nice day, 62°. Fingers crossed someone picks them up. We stop for beer (B pays $29.15) and fill up my car with gas ($28, I pay). I send an e-gift card ($40) to a coworker for her baby shower gift and drink a Monster Zero Ultra during the ride.
5:45 PM: Check into the hotel. I pre-paid in July so no charge today. Break my fast with a Redd's - I fully intend to overindulge tonight.
6:45 PM: Head down to the casino restaurant for supper. I get breaded shrimp, B orders boneless wings. We both drink water to prep for the long night. $30 with tip, B pays since I got the hotel. One of my CNAs messages me about getting their asses chewed in report. Sigh.
8:00 PM: Slot machine time!! I lose $40, go figure. We meet up with a bunch of friends from work and get ready for the show.
10:30 PM: I am front row center with the band. I love these guys! They play covers but dang, they are talented. I scream my head off, take tons of Snapchats, dance with my friends and drink too many beers. Best costume: Big Bird, who sheds yellow feathers all over the dance floor.
Daily total: $108
Day 2: Sunday 10/29
1:00 AM: Show is over and I am officially tipsy. B manages to get me up to our room after I win back $20 on the slots. Our best man randomly stops up for a beer. I have the good sense to rinse off the sweat and apply a vitamin C cream to my face. Adult time ensues, and we pass out around 3:30.
8:18 AM: I'm up! We spent $60 on beers and tips last night. My throat is killing me from all the yelling. We cuddle for a while and talk about how much I needed a night out. I've been stressed lately between fighting with my mom about wedding planning, finances and feeling a lack of respect at my job. B assures me for the 15th time that he's fine with our money set up, and I finally break down and text my boss. I brush my teeth and we check out of the hotel.
9:45 AM: I feel like garbage so obviously I need McDonald's breakfast. ($6.19) Stop to make sure my tires are aired up properly and finish the journey home. PSA: temp changes dramatically affect your tire pressure. Take care of your tires.
10:20 AM: The dogs are very happy to see us. Our incredibly nice neighbor lets them out when we are gone. We play in the yard for a while, then I unpack our bag and start some laundry. B makes a pizza for himself.
12:30 PM: My eyelids are twitching which means my body is tired. Bring my
youngest dog to bed and have a very nice nap after catching up on some Money Diaries and chugging more water.
4:45 PM: The dogs are once again barking frantically and the next thing I know, Z is in my bed! Her grandma brought her home, what a gem. It was Z's cousin T's birthday today, so Z got up at 5:30 to make and serve T breakfast in bed with grandma's help. Z is such a sweet kid. She tells me she wants purple eyeliner for Halloween; she's going as Elsa. I need to replace mine anyways so I find a set with 3 colors on Amazon and pull the trigger on a purple sweater that's been in my cart since August. ($50.58) She watches YouTube videos on her iPad while I scroll the interwebs.
5:30 PM: B makes supper. He fries some burgers and makes French fries in the air fryer. After we eat, we settle into the living room and watch
It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. Sundays are family movie night in our house, but we're all too tired to start anything else. Z is out by 8 which is early even for her 6 year old standards. B turns on the World Series and I fall asleep immediately.
10:15 PM: The dogs want to go out, so I oblige. Throw the ball for our
lab a few times, but it's 34° so the little dogs don't last long. B wakes up from his recliner nap and goes down to bed. I turn on HGTV for beach night. I'm so jealous of all these people living on the ocean. My fav CNA texts me about her night at work. I'm immediately frustrated at the way she's being treated but I try to calm her down. She contemplates requesting a meeting with the boss, and I encourage her to do so.
Daily total: $116.77
Day 3: Monday 10/28
12:30 AM: My schedule changed last month to every Tu-W-Th, but this week I work M-Tu-W so I can take Z trick or treating. So I stay up watching HGTV and texting with the girls at work.
2:36 AM: I don't hear B come upstairs and I scream when he says "boo!" He drinks a glass of milk and goes back down to bed. I make popcorn and start reading a random YA book that was free on my Kindle app. I can't really do anything around the house when I stay up because Z's bedroom is right off the living room, and our bedroom is in the basement along with the washer and dryer. The floors are creaky in too many spots and B is a light sleeper. I mostly cuddle with the dogs.
4:00 AM: Decide to lay in bed and keep reading. I have to kick the
cat out of my spot and she's meowing in protest. B's alarm goes off at 4:45 and I fall asleep shortly after he goes to work.
7:20 AM: Now it's my alarm going off. Z is already awake so I ask her to get ready for school. She argues with me every morning because "school is boring mom!!" Only 7 months left until summer break... I stop at the old house to turn on the heat so the pipes don't burst, and drop Z off at school. Nobody picked up the couch, dang it.
8:15 AM: The cell phone and Hulu withdrawals hit my account, and I spend a few minutes categorizing transactions in my bank app. Pick up around the house a bit and Swiffer up dog hair. It's amazing how much our lab sheds.
11:00 AM: I'm back in bed with my Kindle book. Eventually fall asleep.
5:15 PM: My alarm goes off. I send a message to Z and make sure she's home (she is). We got her set up with Messenger for Kids a few weeks ago and she's obsessed. I get dressed for work, brush my teeth, put some dry shampoo on my roots and some BHA on my face. Grab last night's leftovers and out the door I go. My CNAs are so happy to see me. Drink my Monster during report per usual.
9:45 PM: 6-10 is always the busiest part of our shift, but tonight goes smoothly
knock wood. I even remembered to get my votes in on DWTS. Wtf is Spicer still doing there?! I heat up my two burger patties with cheese (no bun), grab a yogurt and some carrots for dinner. I do OMAD on work days. I've lost 18 pounds so far!
Daily total: $0
Day 4: Tuesday 10/29
1:30 AM: THE COMPUTERS ARE BEING SO SLOW AND I WANT TO DIE.
2:01 AM: The entire system is down now. FML.
2:56 AM: We talk about a tattoo my coworker wants to get on her ass. Apparently a local tattoo shop is running a Halloween special this weekend. She's 20 and it shows, but I love her to pieces. She recently went through a health scare with a tumor in her humerus, but it's thankfully benign and I'm glad to have her back at work.
4:10 AM: The computer system is finally back up so I finish my charting. Check out the web for stamps for wedding stuff. I find a deal on eBay and order 400. ($163.96) The first part of my child support is deposited so I move some money into Z's account and round up my savings to $600.
5:30 AM: We still have the same morning routine: B brings Z to work with him, and I drop her off at daycare when I get done with work. It was a great shift tonight!
6:30 AM: Z has a complete breakdown at daycare when I drop her off, which is very unlike her. I think she's used to spending Monday evenings with me and is thrown off this week. She's always a little attached when she comes back from her dad's. I get home to shower and wash my hair, which is my least favorite chore. I wash with Shea Moisture Coconut and Hibiscus shampoo, condition with Suave Essentials Coconut conditioner and brush it with the conditioner in. Put in some smoothing cream, gel and toss it in a tee shirt. My hair is to the middle of my back, so this is a freaking workout. Use the Vit C cream on my face again. Let the dogs out and put them away in the garage before I go downstairs to read and fall asleep around 11. B comes home on his lunch break every day and lets the pups out.
5:00 PM: I'm up. Normal pre-work drill. B says that one of the girls from work wants the couch, so we go to load it up and it's already gone!! Thank goodness. I drop Z off at taekwondo and head to work.
6:30 PM: Boss is still here so we have a good chat which results in me crying in his office. Embarrassing… Drink my Monster and get working.
10:17 PM: Another decent evening. I didn't bring any leftovers so I raid the kitchen and make myself a taco salad with lettuce, black olives, tomatoes, cheese, ground beef and sour cream. Yum.
Daily total: $163.96
Day 5: Wednesday 10/30
2:21 AM: Is there something in the water this week? Busier than last night, but still have plenty of downtime. I decide to stay on Reddit so I'm not tempted to shop for more wedding stuff.
3:29 AM: I hit up Amazon for some dry mouth lozenges for one of my residents. I generally do not make special purchases like this. ($6.78) My coworker mentions she needs a new TV and she's in luck, because B and I have too many now that we live together.
6:30 AM: I drop Z off at daycare without any issues and meet my coworker at my old house. She picks a 43 inch smart TV and I make $125! Head home for my abbreviated morning (night?!) routine: rinse face, vit C cream, brush teeth. My
oldest dog is acting crazy so I give her some extra attention. Head to my eyelash appointment at 7:30 ($25 + $5 tip, budgeted above).
8:11 AM: I'm in bed with the cat. No place I'd rather be, it's 21° this morning. Browse Reddit for a while, then read until I fall asleep around 10.
4:00 PM: Same shit, different day. I'm up a little earlier because Z has started going to her dad's on Wednesdays. I work and B has dart league every week. Our save the dates were delivered and I'm so happy with them! I pick Z up at 4:30, hand my monthly check over to daycare and then drive Z to her dad's. Trip takes about 45 minutes total. Today was Z's last day of school for the week, so her stepmom will bring her home sometime in the morning.
5:44 PM: The Humane Society where I adopted my cat is asking for donations of Snuggle Safe heat pads. I order one on Amazon and have it shipped straight to them. ($32.34) I try to send items to them 3-4 times a year. Kiss B goodbye as we both head out the door.
11:00 PM: Holy crap it's been busy. Finally get to sit down and attempt to catch up on my charting, which takes about 30 minutes longer than normal tonight.
Daily total: $39.12
Day 6: Thursday 10/31
12:30 AM: B is done with darts and brings me THE BEST steak cubes at work. I'm starving and still pretty busy so I wolf them down along with as much water as my stomach can hold.
2:39 AM: Finally a breather. I address save the dates and have a major hand cramp when I'm done. I gotta figure out a way to print these for our invitations.
4:03 AM: My FSA reimbursement comes through. I leave it in my checking to cover the daycare payment I just dropped off.
6:30 AM: I'm free!! Best part of my job is the 3 day work weeks. Go home, body shower, brush my teeth and let the dogs out. It's 16° this morning so none of them want to play. Ha. I am also exhausted from not getting my 8 hours of sleep all week, but it's been so hard to wind down after work lately. I cuddle with the dogs for a while and go down to bed to read. B took the day off, and having him in bed with me during the week is strange. I finally fall asleep around 11:30.
4:03 PM: Z comes down in her
Elsa costume and demands that I do her eyeliner. She's pumped for trick or treating. I brush my teeth and throw on jeans and a tee shirt.
4:45 PM: Time to head out. We hit a couple businesses and go up to our work where they serve free supper every Halloween. We get hot dogs, chips and a cookie each. Then we walk the neighborhood around my dad's place. We stop at a family friend's house, and she comments on my weight loss. Score! The scale is hard for me to believe since my clothes still fit the same. I sneak a couple swigs of Fireball while we walk because it's 37° and I'm cold. Z ends up with 2 full buckets of candy.
7:00 PM: We're home just in time for Grey's Anatomy! I'm really not enjoying this season but after 14 years of watching this show, it's hard to stop.
8:05 PM: Z gets herself ready for bed and I tuck her in. She's beat. I watch a couple episodes of
The Simpsons' Treehouse of Terror marathon.
Daily total: $0
Day 7: Friday 11/1
1:24 AM: Next thing I know, the dogs are barking to go outside. B and I both fell asleep in the living room. I take care of the dogs and make some popcorn before stealing some Kit Kats out of Z's Halloween haul.
3:00 AM: I go downstairs to read as usual, but I'm out by 3:30.
11:36 AM: Y'all, I was tired. 12 total hours of sleep later and I'm feeling much better. The stamps arrived so I finish our save the dates. B goes to get groceries and pick up E, since he has an early out from school today. Z is still laying in bed 🤣
1:30 PM: Z's dance teachers send out emails regarding costume prices. Our total will be $164 this year, and I have plenty in Z's expense account to cover it. They'll charge my card later this month. I spend some time in my bank app categorizing transactions and moving money around. My account rounds up all my transactions to the next dollar and puts that money into my savings account, and $12.14 was moved this week. I sign up for Disney Plus and update my subscriptions expense to $92. Text with my bestie about wedding planning and my work wife about random stuff.
2:10 PM: E is home! B bought about $200 worth of groceries and random house stuff: fancy frozen pizzas, popcorn, cheese, chicken patties, bread, sandwich meat, milk, cereal, tortillas, black olives, onion rings, tater tots, freezer bags, paper plates, Little Debbie snacks, cold medicine for E, deodorant, body wash, a carbon monoxide detector, dog treats, and I don't even know what else. I'll get the next big haul. He also bought razors and tells me the handle on his DSC one broke, so I go online and order a couple replacements since our next box doesn't come for 6 weeks. ($18.49) My no-spend day is shot, so I order vape juice since it's on sale. ($47.57) I'm 4 months cigarette free and didn't include that little detail in my last diary.
2:46 PM: B gets a fire page. It's a possible gas leak so it should be a quick one. They usually just sit around until the gas company shows up. I hang out with the kids and E catches me up on his week.
4:00 PM: B is home. No gas leak, just overly concerned neighbors. E turns on season 2 of
Stranger Things and we make the frozen pizzas for supper.
7:00 PM: E requests to play board games. My allergies are acting up so I don't join. I feel guilty but my headache praises me. We tend to get rowdy on game night. It's also a hair wash night but I can't be bothered.
9:35 PM: Tuck Z into bed and she's asleep almost immediately. The rest of us aren't too far behind her. E lets the dogs out and I fill up my water bottle. I'm in bed reading at 10.
Daily total: $66.06
Weekly Total: $493.91 I AM SHOOK
Ending checking account balance: $1421.96
Food + Drink: $6.19
Fun + Entertainment: $100
Home + Health: $18.49
Clothes + Beauty: $50.58
Transport: $28
Gifts + Donations: $79.12
Other (vaping and stamps): $211.53
Lastly, reflect on your diary! I purposely chose this week because I knew it would be busy. Going to the casino and staying overnight was a rare treat, although that little trip was kinda 'free' since we used the garage sale money. I also don't buy $165 worth of stamps every week.
shrug I opened a Simple account in August and it has changed my life. It automatically creates envelopes for my money so I'm never concerned about paying my monthly/recurring expenses. All these sinking funds and savings goals are new to me and I'm so proud of myself for setting even this small amount aside. I have never earned interest on my money before.
November will be the last month I pay for my old house. I didn't include the expenses because they are already set aside. Breaking the contract for deed was awkward but necessary. I broke down over the summer when I was getting $200 electric bills and it was still 76° in my house, along with my contract holder seemingly stalking me. I'll be moving any extra money first to my CCs then student loans. If I don't muck up, I can be debt free in about 3-4 years. Thankfully, B is totally on board with this. We are also cash-flowing our wedding, aiming for a $5k budget. B covers most of the bills and I pay for most wedding stuff, and it works for us.
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